Brandis, 27, died by suicide in 2003.

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“I stared at my computer screen, tears rolling down my face.

I could only speculate what Jonathan was going through at that time,” White wrote.

Jaleel White talks about his grief following the death of Jonathan Brandis

Jaleel White talks about his grief following the death of Jonathan Brandis.Getty(2)

In my own way, I was the more well- adjusted success story.

Brandis began acting in TV commercials when he was barely old enough for kindergarten.

He also starred in movies including 1992’sLadybugs, alongsideRodney DangerfieldandJackee Harry, andSidekicks, withChuck Norris.

White said his mother was visiting, and she was staying in his guesthouse.

White told her, “I can’t do this s— anymore, Mom.

This business kills people from the inside.”

“I imagine that Jonathan felt he needed that pilot to feed his soul,” White said.

“Jonathan and I were not close at all as kids.

But he and I always had a way of crossing paths again and again,” White recalled.

“Our closest overlap until now was a mutual acquaintance, actress Tatyana Ali.

He was Tatyana’s real-life boyfriend when I shot my one episode ofThe Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.

Got it, Tatyana.

No one is misconstruing our professional duty.”

Then he decided to find new representation and forge ahead.

Growing Up Urkelis in bookstores now.