A Tribal Council shocker punctuates a riveting 90 minutes of television.
All killer, no filler.
Thats pretty hard to do in an hourlong episode of television.
The tribe at the ‘Survivor 45’ auction.CBS
Its even harder to do on a 90-minute episode.
But thats exactly what we got on this weeks installment ofSurvivor 45.
Absolutely every single thing worked.
Robert Voets/CBS
), or, failing all of that, the Medallion of Power.
But not this week.
This week, I bow down like Wayne and Garth and proclaim, I AM NOT WORTHY!
CBS
The new auction rules?
Katurah continuing her epic anti-Bruce crusade?
The Reba tribe shifting the vote last minute to blindside an absolutely distraught Kellie?
CBS
Epic, and for my money even more dramatic than theJ Mayaexit.
This episode wasSurvivorat its best.
Submit it for an Emmy.
CBS
Hang it in the Louvre.
Put a big DO NOT DELETE sign on your DVR.
they can be shown this.
Jake O’Kane on ‘Survivor 45’.CBS
And their first reaction will be: That was awesome.
Well, thats not entirely true.
Their first reaction will be Why does Katurah hatethis Bruce personso much?
Robert Voets/CBS
But theirsecondreaction will be That was awesome.
As it should be.
Because this weeks episode was awesome in every way.
Lets count some of them.
CBS
Return of the auction
The auction was broken.
Thats the reasonSurvivorhad not aired one in 15 seasons.
A few seasons after that,everybodystarted saving their money and the auction became, essentially, pointless.
The fix seemed simple.
Because while, yes, the powers that be that makeSurvivordid exactly that, they did more.
All the auction money was stuffed into 40 bamboo tubes hidden around the tribe camp.
And different tubes contained different amounts of cash.
There are few things I love more than a reality TV fake-out.
You know, we love our jobs here onAmerican Idol.
But there are parts of our job wedon’tlove.
And one of those parts is coming into a room of people and telling them their journey is over.
Like, it would not even make any sense whatsoever.
Why was he sorry to tell them they had made it through?
None of it added up… which made me love it that much more.
And if and when producers have to tweak it moving forward, they will.
Always bid on the first!
But bidding on the second covered item is a suckers bet.
She should have known better.
And I cant help but be genuinely curious if Austin later puked that eyeball back up.
Anyway, five stars for everything challenge-related this week.
Stabbing the rice
As great as the auction was, the challenge may have been even better.
Unlike some of the balance-something-on-a-part-of-your-body-for-as-long-as-you-can contests, this one translates so well to television.
Its so simple just hold onto the rope.
Yet you’re able to see people struggling and pushing through the pain.
THESE BASTARDS ARE DIGGING DEEP!
And I love a good surprise.
Like, say, a Tyson.
Which is why I had Julie pegged as a winner for this one.
Indeed, it came down to Julie against Bruce.
But thats not why this challenge was so amazing.
For me, it was all about the fact that Probst attempted to murder a bag of rice.
Thats not even a joke or an exaggeration.
WHAT THE F—?!?
What did that bag of rice ever do to Probst?
But at least this time there was a method to the madness.
Dee immediately volunteered, and Emily followed suit.
Drew agreed to sit out, but they still needed a fourth person.
The longer they waited, the more rice they would lose.
Probsts move was so wildly unexpected and the panic that followed was beyond riveting.
Eventually, Katurah volunteered to sit out.
Would she have done the same thing had there not been such a rush to make a decision?
The reaction shots of Katurah when Bruce won immunity.
As if there was anything else we wanted to see.
And what if they instead took a shot at Kellie?
It didnt appear likely.
For one thing, Dee and Julie didnt seem to want any part of it.
Maybe it was because of the alleged womens alliance we heard about the top of the episode.
And I cannot tell you how much I love being drop dead wrong in situations like this.
I was sure Jake was going.
Apparently, Kellie felt the same way.
Which is what made her blindside so absolutely captivating.
And J Maya knew it as well.
But look at the mixture of confusion and devastation on Kellies face as the votes started coming in.
Shes asking Austin and Emily Did you do this?
Katurah and Bruce look stunned.
Its an intoxicating blend of despair and bewilderment.
And the truly masterful and underappreciated thing about this scene?
Go back and watch it.
(I already have four times.)
What the hell, guys?
And there are no answers.
Some people stand to hug her.
You want to see the absolute devastation ofSurvivorin a single scene?
This is the one.
And now the amulet has claimed its second victim.
Do you know something else Drew loves?
Talking in his sleep!
And how do I know this?
Because we have ahilarious exclusive deleted sceneof him doing exactly that.
Check out all the info right here.
Also confirm to enjoy ourexit interview with Kellie.
No auction dollars required!