The final 4 is set.
There was a lot of flat-out amazing stuff onSurvivor 47’s penultimate episode.
Could I complain about producers not showing us more footage ofTeenybring drunk off their caboose at the Survivor Sanctuary?
Teeny Chirichillo, Sue Smey, Andy Rueda, Sam Phalen, Rachel LaMont, and Genevieve Mushaluk on ‘Survivor 47’.CBS
OF COURSE I COULD!
I love to complain!
Besides, drunkenSurvivorfootage is the best kind of footage.
Teeny Chirichillo, Andy Rueda, Rachel LaMont, Sue Smey, Sam Phalen, Genevieve Mushaluk and Jeff Probst on ‘Survivor 47’.CBS
Theres a ton to get to, including my updated season rankings.
Plus, I encourage you all to hit the comment section and lock in your winner prediction now.
So lets make like Teeny with a bottle of wine and get into it.
Sam Phalen, Rachel LaMont and Andy Rueda on ‘Survivor 47’.CBS
As expected, there was a rainbow of reactions.
And there was at least one person who was super impressed with Andys move… ANDY!
(This is the coolest move anyones ever f—ing done ).
Andy Rueda on ‘Survivor 47’.Robert Voets/CBS
At least, it sure feels that way.
At least thats what Ithinkshe was doing.
Was this just because Rachel could no longer stand Sue getting dirt all over her face?
Jeff Probst on ‘Survivor 47’.CBS
I was actually surprised by that, and happily so.
When I saw the challenge ended with aSurvivorlogo puzzle, I considered it a done deal for Rachel.
The woman is a puzzle assassin!
Genevieve Mushaluk on ‘Survivor 47.Robert Voets/CBS
Besides, the truly interesting stuff was happening back at camp between Rachel and Andy.
We got two A+++ scenes out of this dysfunctional Gata duo that are worth touching on.
But here was Rachel essentially telling him in no uncertain terms that the jury did not respect his game.
Rachel Lamont, Sam Phalen, Sue Smey, Teeny Chirichillo on ‘Survivor 47’.Robert Voets/CBS (4)
But even more fascinating was what occurred later, when Andy went into jury management mode.
It was a smart move on his part.
Just one problem: His pitch wastoogood.
The cast of ‘Survivor: David vs. Goliath’.CBS
Maybe Andyhadplayed better than she and everyone else thought.
Perhaps hewasntjust a tool being used by other players to further their own games.
In pleading his case to someone that appeared to be leaving the game, Andy ended up leaving instead.
The cast of ‘Survivor: Winners at War’.Robert Voets/CBS
Honestly, I dont know how much thought Rachel put into it.
So it probably didnt matter much.
And it wasnt just mild-mannered Caroline letting out a F— YEAH!
The cast of ‘Survivor: Millennials vs. Gen. X’.Monty Brinton/CBS/Getty Images
The jury as a whole looked ecstatic.
And thus concludes one of the most fascinating and unforeseen arcs inSurvivorhistory.
But I cant recall a single person that had a bigger mid-game confidence build than Andy Rueda.
The cast of ‘Survivor: Cook Islands’.ABC
The guy simply did not seem emotionally equipped to play the game in those first few days.
He played it hard.
He played it well (if not always during challenges).
Dee Valladares and Austin Li Coon on ‘Survivor 45’.CBS
And he played it all the way to day 23.
Andy said it best himself: Its just an unbelievable transformation Ive had over these 23 days.
Perhaps the biggest one we have ever seen.
Carolyn Wiger on ‘Survivor 44’.Robert Voets/CBS
No hatred here, but two titans of the game squaring off.
Stars & stripes vs. the maple leaf.SNLvs.SCTV.
Border war!!!!
Sol Yi on ‘Survivor 47’.Robert Voets/CBS
But you know whodidntthink it was super cool?
Stack and fall
Sooooo…
But the past few seasons, theyve gotten the players out and moving more.
Robert Voets/CBS
Like this second challenge.
But it doesnt matter.
It may be mere window dressing, but it tastes damn good.
Timothy Kuratek/CBS/Getty Images
Again, not a complaint.
You know I love watching montages of human misery.
And we got plenty of that with this one.
Monty Brinton/CBS
We saw Genevieve and Rachel watch their whole stack of balls drop.
But it wasnt just comedy.
And then taking forever to not just place her final ball, but remove her giant tongs-like stacking utensil.
Monty Brinton/CBS
Thats just my default factory setting.
Also, apropos of nothing, those balls and tops in between made them look like smores.
This did not make me aSurvivormastermind.
Bill Inoshita/CBS
It was the obvious and only play.
The only question was, would they believe him?
Even when Genevieve confirmed the idol was fake, there was still a reason to be skeptical.
Sandra Diaz-Twine and Boston Rob Mariano of ‘Survivor: Island of the Idols’.Robert Voets/CBS
As we went to Tribal, the question remained what the trio would do.
Because the main headline was that Genevieve was finally gone, voted out 3-2.
Genevieves arc was certainly not as miraculous as Andys, but her edit was.
But eventually, we were treated to her stealth and savvy game.
Lets break down their chances real quick.
Robert Voets/CBS (4)
RACHELShe is definitely in the pole position.
If Rachel makes it to the final three, the game is hers.
And if she is as dominant at fire as people say, then the game may already be over.
She is clearly respected and well-liked by the jury.
Shes won three individual immunities.
And she has a big, recent signature move.
But that shouldnt be enough to deny her.
SAMSam has been mentioned as a big threat ever since the merge, but his actual resume is thin.
Maybe he gets a lot of credit for Operation: Italy, maybe he doesnt.
But maybe the joke is on me!
A final challenge victory would also help in that regard.
Sue definitely has a shot if everything breaks her way.
I recognize that is a big if.
TEENYMy episode 1 pick to win the game has made it all the way to episode 14.
The good news for Teeny is that I see them sitting at the end.
Like Rachel, Teeny has been left out of a lot of votes.
But unlike Rachel, Teeny has not had a big splashy move or multiple individual immunity wins.
Also, my hunch is that Teeny is seen as a very emotional player.
Survivorseason-by-season rankings from best to worst
1.
AfterMicronesiaaired, I named it the bestSurvivorseason ever.
So then I returned that to the number one spot.
If I wanted to watch one season again, it would beMicronesia.
If you ask me which is the mostimportantseason, well, obviously it’sBorneo.
3.Survivor: Heroes vs. VillainsThe Russell vs. Boston Rob feud made for the best pre-merge run of episodes ever.
And the greatness just kept on coming.
Filled with huge memorable moments like Tyson voting himself off, J.T.
giving Russell his immunity idol, and Parvati handing outtwoimmunity idols at one Tribal Council.
I know many people would consider this No.
1, but it’s all returnees.
For me, the fresh blood ofMicronesiakeeps that season higher.
(Maybe not well at all times, but at least they were playing.)
moment to a truly exhilarating season.
That’s what it all comes down to.
And it’s not just Christian, who was one of the most universally loved contestants of all-time.
That is an amazing 9 out of 20 that I would easily welcome back on another season.
Often, that’s all a season needs.
And that really is first and foremost the reason Davidvs.
Goliathbecame an all-time great.
But there were other trophies to hand out as well.
The editing job done by producers was perhaps the show’s best ever.
They experimented with new techniques that served to freshen up the franchise in its 37th season.
They added comedic flourishes that were totally unnecessary yet improved the episodes nonetheless.
They cut back and forth between players and stories in ways they never had before.
A top 5 finish.
6.Survivor: Cambodia Second ChanceThe first thing to note aboutCambodiais how well all the production twists turned out.
Letting fans vote in the cast?
Hiding idols at challenges?
I think you all know how I feel about that.
Tempting people to quit an immunity challenge for a mystery vote steal advantage?
All the tribe switcheroos?
They played out to perfection.
TheSurvivorproducers always throw a bunch of twists out there.
Usually, some work and some don’t.
This season, they all paid dividends.
I also appreciated how hard the bulk of the cast was playing.
Usually, you get a small handful of big-time gamers.
Another plus: The votes were completely unpredictable from week to week, leading to some truly crazy Tribals.
Sure, the challenges were a bit blah, but still, a rousing and triumphant success.
(MaybePirate Masteris to blame for that?)
Obviously, there was a stellar cast with big personalities.
Fairplay not only pulling off the dead grandma lie but also getting drunk at Tribal Council.
Osten becoming the first person to lay down his torch.
Savage willing his tribe to win.
And Sandra getting in faces.
It was all delicious.
Some people, like Ben and Michele, had something to prove.
His return alone was one of the best reality TV stories ever.
Go back and watch it.
It’s amazing on both a technical and an emotional level.
And Tony Vlachos cemented his reputation as the most entertaining and dominant player of all time.
I can’t tell you how satisfying it is to have a great winner on such an important season.
And itdidfeel special, even with its flaws.
I wish the show would shake things up like that more at the outset to keep contestants off-balance.
One of the best creative decisionsSurvivorever made was not panicking and reshuffling the tribes once Koror started dominating.
Also, I’d bring back Jolanda, Coby, Katie, and Ian back in a heartbeat.
Every single person added something.
That’s how you win a million dollars.
Possibly the least scenic camps inSurvivorhistory.
It just looked absolutely miserable.
And I still jump when Chicken gets voted out.
WhenMillennials vs. Gen Xstarted, most of us were like, “Yeah, it’s fine.
Not amazing, but not terrible either.”
But then things kept happening.
And everyone kept flipping on one another.
And everyone kept getting blindsided.
And everyone kept futilely using their idols for other people.
It was madness and chaos in the best way possible.
And what was so fascinating was that (with the exception of Michaela) nobody took their ouster personally.
This was a season remarkably free of any sort of fighting whatsoever.
None of the ugliness ofWorlds ApartorKaoh Rongpermeated the proceedings, even amongst all the lying and backstabbing.
Even Hannah was entertaining with her neurosis.
Even Ken was entertaining with his late-game cluelessness.
Bret gave us a touching moment where he came out as gay to Zeke.
Sunday outsmarted Adam and Hannah with a ruse at Tribal Council.
(However, I still can’t figure out why they went with three-person duels a.k.a.
truels and they definitely should have stopped RI at the merge.)
So why is it so high?
Because the casting and storylines that developed gave us people to root for and against something every greatSurvivorseason needs.
And that’s not all.
Seriously, that guy was straight gold in every episode.
BRING HIM BACK!!!!
There were some other problems early on as well, but what a difference a mutiny makes.
Then we had clearly defined people to root for and against.
There are other things to love as well.
Plus, just look at all the great first-time contestants (Parvati, Penner, Ozzy, Yul).
I love you, Billy.
But hear me out first before you Russell any feathers.
It was flat-out grating.
But everything post-merge was spectacular.
There were moves and countermoves galore down the homestretch.
Also, don’t overlook how great the bevy of water challenges was.
Should I push it down in the rankings due to the lackluster Reunion show that followed?
He was denied in the end, though, in the most controversial jury decision ever.
19.Survivor: TocantinsOkay, you may roll your eyes at Coach 1.0.
But imagine for a second this season without him.
His unintentional comedy single-handedly lifts this into middle of the pack territory for me.
However, the unlikely alliance between bookish northerner Fishbach and country boy J.T.
certainly made for a compelling thread throughout the season.
20.Survivor 45Let me say this first: This is the best produced season in the new era ofSurvivor.
But it wasntjustthe extra runtime.
Other creative flourishes, like the return of the new and improved auction, were home runs.
At least for now.
21.Survivor 46Survivor 46was not a perfect season, by any means.
(Obviously, if it was, it would be ranked a lot higher).
While there were plenty of blindsides, there were few (if any) pick-your-jaw-up-off-the-floor shockers.
If there was true next-level gameplay, it did not translate to the screen.
Confrontation is a good thing.
Probst also did his part,getting some of his bite backin interactions with the cast.
An all-time great character.
One of the most delightfully funny narrators in the show’s history.Frannie and Matt?
Arguably the most adorkable showmance couple ever.
The episodes also breathed well and did not get bogged down in too many advantages and idol hunts.
There was also more diversity in post-merge challenges, which was a plus.
So, with all that said, then why doesSurvivor 44just miss the top 20?
That’s just bad luck.
I know I was.
I have no big complaints about this season at all.
It was a totally solid entry for the best reality TV franchise on the planet… just not transcendent.
Shane Powers should have been brought back forHeroes vs. Villains.
And theSecond Chanceseason, for that matter.
Seriously, what the hell?!?
Get that guy back on TV.
But I still can’t figure out how/why Bob Dawg didn’t get a bigger and better edit.
That guy is an absolute gas, whether in or outside of Casa de Charmin.
Tears, anger, confusion all in abundance.
And it was wonderful to see.
The early and mid-game parade of tears and jeers out of Tribal Council truly felt like old schoolSurvivor.
I could see some people naming this as their favorite new-era season.
But it has been a fun ride nonetheless.
The argument for ranking it lower would be the pure repetition factor.
Anytime you have a perpetual “been there, done that” feeling…that’s bad.
Especially when most of those twists and challenges were not great to begin with.
However, the producers did a much better job of editing and presenting that content.
26.Survivor 41This may be the hardestSurvivorseason ever to rank.
Let’s get to the bad before the good.
That’s not good.
Which was a shame because when allowed to, this cast delivered in a huge way.
Early boots like Brad and J.D.
That’s a hell of a lineup right there.
Not that I thought all the changes were bad.
27.Survivor: Ghost IslandThis was another hard season to rank.
This idea was used a few years later onSurvivor South Africa: Immunity Island.)
And then there is the ending, which also has plusses and minuses.
So again, both good and bad.
Like I said, a hard season to rank.
But the ending was fantastic, and I was engaged throughout, even with the noted weaknesses.
I liked watching Kellyn act like a super-spaz.
I was fascinated with the Laurel and Donathan strategic push-and-pull.
Throw that all together and you end up in the middle of the pack.
28.Survivor: Game ChangersWhat a weird season this was.
We were treated to two titans of the game (Tony and Sandra) going toe to toe.
But something was missing.
Said events were all exciting, but they failed to form a cohesive unit.
all gone before the merge.
And despite the gameplay and unpredictability down the stretch, that is kind of what happened.
And then there is what happened to Cirie in the finale.
(The fact that it happened to a true legend in Cirie made it even harder to swallow.)
But there is one thing I reallydiddig about this season, and that is the cast.
30.Survivor 43Seasons 41 and 42 featured really dynamic casts and some really wonky production wrinkles.Survivor 43flipped the script completely.
For the most part, the game flow either by design or sheer luck worked out really well.
But the cast, while extremely likable, were not super propulsive.
Where were the fireworks?
Instead, we got a lot more gauzy, reach-for-the-Kleenex backstory photo montages, but little sizzle.
I think this season sets a land speed record for number of times women call each other bitch.
Like, there is a staggering amount of bitch-related talk.
Its undeniably entertaining to watch so much open animosity.
The LeAnn blindside episode remains an all-time great installment.
But that stellar casting does not extend to the other sex.
But I have watched this season multiple times and still could not pick J.D.
out of a lineup from John and Brady.
And the whole I cant believe were losing to a bunch of girls!
angle feels a bit stale considering we had the same storyline three seasons earlier onThe Amazon.
But you were right, Eliza.
Its better than I remembered, and the new ranking reflects that.
32.Survivor: The Australian OutbackAn overrated season in my book.
Pretty predictable boot order as well.
Dude didburn his hands off, though.
And, outside of one mind-bogglingly boring loved ones reward contest, the challenges were strong.
But now comes the bad news.
Like the majority ofSurvivornation, I was not a fan of the new final four fire-making twist.
That was a bummer.
34.Survivor: Kaoh RongNot one of the best seasons ever; not one of the worst.
That’s always exciting.
Working against this season is the fact that there simply were not enough transcendent players in the cast.
That’s a problem.
That said, man, were there some hate-fueled fireworks at those final few Tribal Councils.
The fact that so many unworthy players went so far is simply too damning.
38.Survivor: Redemption IslandThe first three episodes were dynamite, but then the fuse blew out.
39.Survivor: AfricaSome great challenges.
Not that much else was great.
40.Survivor: Edge of ExtinctionFlat.
That’s the best word I can think of to describe the season.
At least give them a place where they can go in the water!
Rafe was good for a few laughs, though.
Especially on rope obstacles.
A 2015Rob Has a Podcastpoll ranked it 22nd out of 30 seasons at the time.
( I can’t believe you all are going to make me watch John Rocker all over again.)
43.Survivor: One WorldLook, I have total respect for Kim’s game.
Like Tom inPalauand Rob inRedemption Island, she excelled strategically, socially, and physically.
Unfortunately, that is really the only good thing I can say about this season.
And that’s too bad because I do think the “One World” concept was a solid one.
But, man, what a thoroughly uninspiring cast.
Speaking of awful creative decisions…
46.Survivor: NicaraguaIt’s way down here for a few reasons.
- Splitting the tribes up by age and theMedallion of Powerwere both enormous flops.
)Nicaraguahad just too many unlikable players.
Two people quitting with only 11 days left.
No big memorable moments.
Unfortunately, it was people quitting, and that was memorable for all the wrong reasons.
47.Survivor: Island of the IdolsI’m a guy who tends to be pretty analytical.
But even I recognize that when it comes to rankingSurvivorseasons, it ultimately comes down to a feeling.
But nothing seemed fun in light of the far more serious issue that clearly outweighed the final game result.
Quite simply: It made the rest of the season impossible to enjoy.
And so here it sits.
